After a twelve hour laborious wait, the stork finally landed, and my first born son was delivered. He was beautiful, he weighed 1.6 pounds and was 64gb in size; I am of course talking about the Apple iPad, and unlike a real child doesn’t poop, be sick or wake me up at three o’clock in the morning. What more could a parent ask for?
As mentioned on my previous posts, like most parents I wanted my son be to the best at everything. His A4 1ghz processor insured that he would be great at completing his chores quickly and without fear of crashing to the floor, meanwhile the 3G and wifi connectivity meant that he could communicate effectively with the outside world from day one.
Like all expectant parents when told that delivery is likely to occur between a set window of 8am and 6pm, and having sat waiting by the window for 10 hours, when the tenth hour and tenth minute pass you start to worry that something has gone wrong. Just like all obstetrician’s on Christmas day, TNT had a massive task on their hands delivering thousands of iPads to their new parents. Luckily (as mentioned in my post yesterday) their customer service was top notch, and at 20:14 my screams of delight were heard around the house, as my child was delivered.
I wanted my son to walk as soon as he was delivered, however this was sadly not the case. He needed to be cleaned off (taken out of the box), and have his umbilical cord cut (synced with iTunes) before he was of any use to anyone. However this moment was savoured as I knew that I wouldn’t get another one like it for at least a few months; as conceiving (announcement of new Apple products takes time) as does the ability to afford one!
Having wrapped little David up in his new blanket (case), the time had come to see what he could do. I loaded him up and was amazed as to how quickly he moved. Unlike his parents (older computers) little David had the ability to move within the blink of an eye; he was fast, he was accurate and did everything that I wanted of him.
David is incredibly easy to use, a few basic parental skills need to be mastered, however those who have either had children (iPhones or macs) before or played with their friends, will soon master the art.
You can give your son three kinds of toys (applications) to play with, either native ones (those which were designed for the iPad) or hand-me-downs (those designed for the iPhone). Native applications ares a joy to use, they are crisp and take full advantage of the new features on offer. Hand-me-down apps do look very tired, having not been designed to be played with by little David, but instead little Rachel from next door. David will quite happily play with such toys (by upscaling the apps to fill the screen), however there is just something wrong with allowing your son play with a Barbie, you could do better and get more enjoyment. The third option is to buy universal toys. If you are expecting to buy your first iPhone in the future get applications, (or many developers offer a free upgrade) that will take advantage of both the iPad and iPhone features.
I initially thought that I wanted to protect little David from the world, prevent him from getting damaged and scratched. I bought him a case to protect him from all minor bumps, and had invested in a screen protector to, however this was too much. David just didn’t like it, it took away his new born look so after five minutes I decided that he was to be used and enjoyed, and if he gets damaged along the way so be it.
Overtime I will of course give further updates on which toys (applications) I have purchased little David, however I just wanted to get the news out hay my son had arrived, show pictures of him, and let you know that I shall not be returning him.
For those who do not want children (an iPad) and think that all it is an over sized iPhone you would be wrong. Go round to your friends house, play with theirs and you will understand and learn, that its not a replacement for the child you already have, its a completely new one.